Book Info:
Title: Midnight Riders
Author: Pete Clark
Publisher: J. Ellington Ashton Press
“Gather ‘round people and you shall hear
about a bunch of bullshit that is clear.
Of riders and horses and monsters too;
your parents lied - they can still get you.
Hardly anyone who was there is alive
to dispel the rumor, uncover the lies,
but there was more than one man who rode that day
and more than just Redcoats who got in their way.”
Along the way, Longfellow lost something in his translation it seems.
Everyone has heard of the French and Indian War and the American Revolution. However, they have not heard about them this way! The American founding fathers had a lot more to deal with at the end of the 18th century than tariffs and tea; avoiding hurled trees from Wendigos and gargoyles falling from the sky took a lot of patience. How is Samuel Prescott supposed to hunt the leader of the Rippers when the British keep infringing upon the colonists’ rights?
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Boone was sure he heard Revere scream as the zombie Forbes charged at them. On his way, Forbes took a nice hearty bite out of an off duty soldier who happened to be nearby. “Grullarrk,” the soldier said clearly before falling to the ground.
Forbes Zombie was fast. A hell of a lot faster than Forbes was in real life. How the heck did that work out, Boone wondered. Oh well. He unslung his double-barreled reverse musket, an invention of Revere; the guy was good for something, thought Boone as he fired and turned his former commanding officer’s head into a floating cloud of red mist. He then flipped the release on his musket, spun the barrels so that the fired barrel faced back and the loaded faced forward, and he vaporized the downed soldier’s head as well just to be sure. He wasn’t about to let any zombies rise on his watch.
“Everybody to the wall,” Fraser ordered. It seemed that Boone’s gunfire and the shrieking had alerted the remaining werewolves, who were apparently done feasting on the French and wanted to upgrade to a little English breakfast.
“Zombies and werewolves,” whined Revere. “I sure hope no vampires show up.”
“Vampires?” Boone countered. “What are you, a child? Vampires aren’t real.”
“They’re not?” asked Revere.
“No - vampires are just a myth. But dragons, dragons will fuck your shit up,” said George Washington.Review
Normally I'm not the person that likes historically books because I don't like to really live in the past like that but when I heard that this book was about werewolves, vampires, witches and all other things I was intrigued. At first I really felt that I was not going to like this book but as I kept reading I became engrossed in the story and reading about some of the people I liked hearing about in school. This book was a twist of things and that is what really made me start liking it. I always loved Boone and Washington and reading about them with this twist made me like them even more. If you are looking for something different tan this is most definitely the book for you.
Rating
Top 10 Urban Legends
Here are some Urban Legends I like in no particular order.
Three Men and a Baby Ghost
This is a bad movie from the ‘80s. But in one scene, you can
see a ghostly figure in the background that is not meant to be in the movie.
Booga booga. It is in fact the dead ghost of a boy who killed himself in the
same house that the scene was filmed. This legend ran wild for a bit after the
movie and I know people who rented it just to show other people the ghost
scene.
Creepy? Well no. It was just a cardboard person-shaped
standee that no one had remembered to move. But at least this crap movie got a
few more rentals out of the legend.
Killswitch Invisible Demon
Killswitch is a
video game. At the beginning, you had to choose between playing as a female or as
an invisible demon. As playing with an invisible character is rather troubling,
people choose the female. In addition, it was rumored that if you defeated the
game with the demon, all your data of the game would be immediately erased. So
there was no evidence of anyone having ever beaten it as the demon. One day, some
guy got the game and said he was going to record his entire playthrough as the
demon. The posted video featured only the gamer looking as his screen and
weeping. The explanation for this is unclear.
Bloody Mary
A classic that everyone knows but sometimes, in the right
environment, it can still make mirrors scary. Go ahead and say Bloody Mary
three times in front of a mirror. I dare you.
“Aren’t You Glad You
Didn’t Turn on the Light?”
A college student comes back to her dorm room and does not
want to disturb her roommate. Variations of the story is that her roommate is
either sleeping in order to rest for a big exam or possibly banging her
boyfriend with the lights off. So, to be nice, the arriving roommate does not
turn on the light and ignores whatever sounds come from the other side of the
room. Of course, what is happening is her roommate is being murdered in the
dark and when she wakes the phrase, Aren’t you glad you didn’t turn on the
light, is painted on the wall in blood. Kind of creepy to think that someone is
only a few feet away and killing someone. And also nice to know that some
killers are thoughtful enough to leave without disturbing their victim’s
roommate.
Polybius
Another alleged video game. You remember arcades? Great. Me,
too. Well, this game supposedly arrived in random arcades with no information
as to how the game appeared. It had only the name of the game and a single
joystick. The game was fun and people played it; however, the rumor is it drove
people mad. Some had seizures and a few committed suicide. It was also told
that men in black clothes came and worked on the game from time to time.
Sketchy as hell. I’m sticking with Rolling
Thunder.
Wizard of Oz and the hanging Munchkin
There is a scene where, if you look closely as Dorothy heads
down the yellow brick road, you can see a dead munchkin hanging from a tree. He
was sick of being a damn munchkin and hung himself. Nobody noticed until after.
So his dead munchiness is in the movie now.
Or actually no. Apparently it was some kind of rare bird
from a zoo or something. That is actually pretty good too.
New Urban legend: In the Wizard of Oz, as Dorothy is going
down the yellow brick road you can see a mysterious demon bird from Hell’s zoo.
It is on a tree and waiting to eat her soul.
The Midnight Rider
This is one of the most likely to be true. Legend says that
if you purchase two copies of Pete Clark’s Midnight
Riders in paperback and hold them against it other, cover to cover, while
you chant ”Ich liebe dieses buch” three times, then the ghost of Benedict
Arnold will come out of the joining of the spines and tell you the true story
of his betrayal. If you’re nice, he may also mow your lawn. Booga booga.
Daddy Long Legs
When I was little, we had many daddy long legs spiders in
our yard. And frequently I was told that they are the most deadly and poisonous
spiders in the world. While I was running away, the person would then shout at
me, “but it can’t hurt you.” This was confusing. The rumor here was that its
mouth was so small it could not bite a human and so its mighty poison was
worthless. Ha ha almost scary spider, squish you. This is not true. The
spider’s mouth is actually plenty big enough to poison the hell out of you!
That or it isn’t poisonous.
Chaos in Cars
There are a few of these and I sort of like them all. The
people on a date hear scratching so, in terror, they drive off and a hook is
stuck to the door. Ouch for the creepy guy. Or somebody is flashing their
lights behind a kid driving at night; he or she is terrified and drives home
only to discover that a killer was in the back seat and whenever the pursuer
flashed their lights, the killer would lay back down. A killer scared of high
beams apparently. Or the one where the kind person gets out of the grocery
store to find a tired old woman wrapped in blankets in her back seat. “Oh but
I’m cold and tired,” she would say. Then the cops come and discover it is some
dude with an axe dressed as an old lady. Ah cars, they’ll get ya.
Top ten lists
People who read top ten lists and mentally mock the items
listed or think, this one is stupid; what
about this other one that I like? They are destined for a well heated
corner of Hell. This legend has been passed on for centuries but the tale has
grown with the internet’s obsession with lists. So mock lists at your own risk
as the list reaper will, uh, reap you? I guess. Yeah that works. Booga booga
again.
Pete Clark likes writing, animals, potato chips, and cheese. Midnight Riders is his first published novel, although he can also proudly say he finally finished Helix Crashing, the fantasy novel he has been working on for over a decade. Someday, it will be out. In addition, he has written Across the Barren Landscape, a collection of linked Western short stories, and Tales from Midnight's Graveyard, a collection of unconnected horror, science fiction, fantasy, and supernatural stories. He cowrote Backward Compatible: A Geek Love Story with author Sarah Daltry. He also writes plays, both dramatic and comedic. When he is not writing, Pete tends to ignore everyone around him and obsess over sports.
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